Wednesday, November 06, 2013


The other day I talked about parenting with a Filipino lady who is in her 30's and single.
I have two daughters, and fortunately they are already independent. My younger daughter got married this spring, and she and her husband lives in TOKYO. My elder daughter is still single, she pursues her life in an art world. Next week she is going to hold her personal exhibition in TOKYO.
And Yuki and I live in Utsunomiya where is 100 km far from TOKYO. These days we seldom our daughters.
So the special thing about my elder daughter is her strong motivation to make works.
And the special thing about my younger daughter is the attitude not to attach to anything. It means she doesn't pursue her career, but she likes doing work, so she doesn't choose a type of a job. 

The Filipino lady asked some questions to me.
1, Did you help your children with their homework?
Yes, especially I used to help them with their special summer homework. But I didn't help them with daily school homework.
But to tell the truth, probably they didn't ask me to help them. I was interested in doing summer "science" homework.

2. What were some things that you would not allow your children to do?
I think we don't have strict rules. But I like being punctual, and I don't like to tell a lie.

3.What are some things that you would allow your children to do that you think other parents may not allow their children to do?
I didn't compare ourselves with other parents. --- Probably nothing special.

4. Do you think that you are a good parent? Why?
I believe we are good parents. Because I think we've kept good relation ship.
Anyway I did as much as I could.

5. What do you think are some of the most difficult problems faced by parents now a days?
Well, it seems to be difficult apart from financial problems.
Probably all parents are afraid of their children being truant, being bullied and becoming a bully.
These days the contents of bullying is different from old-style bullying.

6. Should a good mother give up her job to stay at home with her children?
I think not to "give up" her job, but if you "choose " to stay at home as a mother, it's not bad. Actually I chose staying at home as a mother so I quit my job.

7. Should women always get custody (keep the children) after a divorce?
At first I didn't understand this meaning. In Philippines, when women dicvorce and her children were under the age of 7, they get automatically custody. In Japan, if children are under the age of 10, mothers tend to get custody, but we don't have a rule.


Anonymous said...

Mieko, I think your response about giving up a job or choosing to stay home is very astute. In reality, you are trading one type of job for another. Anyone who thinks raising children, managing a home with all the responsibilities that goes with it does not place value on that job, which is too bad. Jan

Mieko said...

For me, staying at home meant educating my daughter.If I had found a good educator (not baby sitter), I would have chose to keep my job. Now the job is done, so I'd like to work for myself, but these days my body won't do what I tell it to .