trouble shooter 1104

 Troubleshooter

I regret being impulsive and always dwell on things I’ve done.

I’m an official worker in my 60s. I’m worried about my character which is that I am impulsive and usually regret doing things afterwards. I know I should not dwell on regret, and move on. But I can’t stop myself worrying about things I’ve done.

It might be usual that people regret doing some things. However, in my case it occurs more often. It’s a burden for me and difficult to get over with.

When I talk with my friends, I always think “Why did I say such things. I shouldn’t have”.  When I buy something at a shop, I always think “Why did I buy this item, I shouldn’t have”.

In my daily life I always regret doing some things, thinking “I shouldn’t have done it”. I always feel down. I can’t become positive. How do I feel and look at things positively without regret?

Adviser (a philosopher) 

All of us are not perfect. We live comparing ourselves to others. So, it is natural to feel regret in our life. We can’t make the best choice all the time. So, we always look back and say “I shouldn’t have done it”.

How about this idea “we have no choice”. The way we go was only one. This way of thinking was introduced by SOUSHI who was a philosopher in China. His philosophy is “BANBUTS SEIDOU” (the Equality of Things). All things are one and the same. We are not God, so we can’t see everything. We see one side but everyone has different view from each other. Choice is the same. When we chose one way, we should think it was the only way to choose. Our life is only one way. We think we sometimes stand at a fateful crossroads. However, there is only one way to choose. Not to deny ourselves, not to regret mistakes we have made in our lives, and to accept ourselves positively, is the way of “BANBUTS SEIDOU”. It might be meaningful for us.

You should go ahead thinking when you chose the way it was only the way for you. We can’t go back even though we regrated doing what we chose.