troubleshooter 0926

 Dear troubleshooter

I can’t make friends due to the COVID-19 pandemic

I’m in my 80’s. I have no work. A few years ago I moved to an apartment which is easy to live for the elderly. My previous house was on the hill so it became inconvenient for me since my husband passed away, I became alone and older.

When I was living in the previous house, I was a member of a hobby circle, and had lots of friends. I had never felt lonely. I was going to join a new group after moving and make new friends. Actually I joined a Karaoke circle and started making friends. However due to the Covid-19 the circle naturally stopped meeting. My neighbors have already been in contact with each other tightly before I came. It seems difficult for me to join them smoothly as a new comer.

Recently most of the day I stay home alone, and I seldom talk to someone. I sometimes write letters to my old friends, or take a walk. I sometimes feel very lonely.

I don’t worry about my life economically and physically. So I have to live my life with gratitude. However I’m not satisfied with my life. How could I find the way to spend lively and fulfilling days?

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At first I really respect you, because you haven’t lost your willingness to make friends. While you keep such willingness and do some action, you must get a good result sometime soon.

To make friends, the most important thing is to get information, and the next is some action. Unfortunately, we tend to keep distance even among neighbors due to the pandemic. But even in such situation we still have many chances to meet new people. The way to get information is basically newspaper, TV, HP, or local community newspaper. Probably your city publishes the local newspaper once a month. And usually the city government holds some programs to make community for the elderly, or counseling meeting. Such programs and meetings are very reasonable or free. Without hesitation you should take action.

I’m also in my 80’s. My first step to join a hobby club is to look for advertisement from the newspaper.

Additionally, let me say one thing. We are in our 80’s. We could easily fall over. We should watch out our step Please don’t forget it.

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I think it will become my problem. And not to have the problem, I need to keep some action.

Good morning 0929

 

Though from tonight I feel myself “close-fisted” and dislike such me, it is all right. That’s me. Sometimes I compare with someone in the same generation. 

On today’s news paper, an interesting recipe was introduced. I will try it. 

Good morning 0928

 Today, Yuki makes a contract with a company to buy a new car. The new car will come in three months. 

This time he decided to buy small suv type car. Changing a car is included in the schedule of our retirement life, though our saving decrease. Anyway in two years our pension will start.

Good morning 0927

 

We got a melon from a friend. We really enjoyed it.

Today it is a usual day. 

 In the morning I go to the gym and Yuki goes to play tennis.

In the afternoon, we have nothing special. I will wait for a call from my mother ( probably today it won’t come), then I practice the piano and enjoy reading.

I also put this sign in front of my house. “Open my library” I hope some neighbors drop by.

Well, tonight Yuki goes to a studio for his band practice.

So, today it is no alcohol day for him. Even after he comes back late he is not able to drink. It is our recent rule.

Good morning 0926

 

A new week has started.

Our elder daughter is now in Kumamoto. Her works are displayed at public contemporarily art museum Kumamoto

Unfortunately English site isn’t prepared yet. 

In the morning we are going to a bank, city hall, and some other places to do errands. Probably we have lunch outside.

In the afternoon I open my small private library, probably no one comes. I have to think, how I advertise my project. 

lunch diary 0924

Monday

I forgot to take a picture of our lunch on Monday. I went to the supermarket that was renewed with my neighbor's wife and got a bowl of cutlet.

In the afternoon I weeded. I put  my daughter's discarded work casually to enjoy ourselves. it is "Autumn Garden".

Tuesday

Both two of us are into to Sagamiya's tofu cuisine these days.

In the afternoon, we went to the city hall to finish some errands.

Wednesday

Suddenly, our elder daughter came home with a sandwich and roast beef of "KAWAMURA" restaurant  in Ginza. On the way to Gunma, she stopped by around Tochigi. It became  a great birthday of Yuki..

Thursday

Our elder daughter left at 5am. Last night, she said, "I haven't eaten bitter gourd this year,"  so I got it from my neighbor and cooked bitter gourd.

The leftover is our lunch. The other present which was arranged by our younger daughter has not arrived yet. Because it is so she..

Friday

We were  finally able to eat the limited edition "Tsukimi Pie". With just one hamburger, both the fat and saturated fatty acids of the day exceeded the standard values, but well, okay.

from private classroom to private library

 

Finally I changed the room. I also put away many books. Today a used book store come to take some books to my house. 

Good morning 0923

 

It is a holiday. And it is rainy.

Well, our missions of today are three.

1, going to a nearby temple to get some information about fall events.

2, going to a men’s casual and sports close shop which opens yesterday nearby. I thing it must be crowded.

3, going to a local “small” public hall, because they hold An small exhibition to introduce the history of Honda in Tochigi.

I have some coupons of Macdonald, if it is not crowded we will go through the drive-thru.

Good morning 0922

 Our elder daughter T left here at 5.  We have a usual morning, though we are sleepy.

Anyway today, in the morning we do usual things, like going tennis, and going to the gym

In the afternoon, we are going to a used book shop??  which recently opened, and deals with English picture books as art works. 

Good morning 0921

 

It is a very cold morning though it is still in September. “So” a heater is already working. 

Today unexpectedly our elder daughter comes and stay with us. 

Tomorrow she has work at the next prefecture, so she will leave here early morning tomorrow. On the way to go she decided to drop by here. 

In the afternoon, Yuki goes to see a doctor, I have work, but we are able to have dinner together.

Anyway I need to put a heater in her room instead of electrical fan.

Good morning 0920

 

Today unfortunately it is raining. So Yuki has no tennis. He will spend the day lazy. In the afternoon we might go to the city hall to check a document.

At 11:00 (Japan time) I open zoom, and read an English picture book together using this site.  This time I didn’t prepare my original video. I hope some attendance will be there. It automatically closes in 40 minutes.

If you are interested in it, please give a comment.

Good morning 0919

 

On our Japanese calendar it is a national holiday. 

“So ” retiree Yuki  has no work of tennis. 

He is going to go fishing . It is the last day to fish in some rivers.

Yesterday, I finally asked to pick my books up to a used book shop which mainly deals with English books. A driver will come this weekend. So I will organize my books more today.

Low birth rate in Japan

 A friend introduced this article.

Will Japanese people ‘cease to exist’?

The other day on Japanese news paper, this editorial column was introduced.

Give bold support to young generation for child-rearing

Some people take this issue seriously, and some people are optimistic saying decreasing the birth rate will stop someday, the others probably try to not to think about (including me).

However, according to the news paper, according to a questioner by the government, some tens percent of unmarried people between 18 and 34 don' want to marry permanently. The reason is having child takes lots of money and loss their own free time.

I think financial problem is the biggest reason. What I can say is I want not to widen the gap of economic. I know we have a wide variety of people. But I don't want to be divided into to parties. 

lunch diary 0917

Monday

In the morning each of us went to a different clinic.  My husband got caught in a health checkup and needed re-examination. When we  got home, we were tired. So we thought to go out  to eat something. But the medical expense for the two of us was higher than we thought. So we had "somen" nodal at home.　That's life.

Tuesday

I got plenty of eggplants at hand... Now, what should we do? I have also made pickles. I cooked Fried rice with eggplants which were cut roughly. I used them up.

Wednesday

Last night, I made pressed sushi with leftover rice. It's beautiful, and I'm proud of myself. I had a kind of homemade marone grace. I took my hat off to her.

Thursday

I cooked fried rice again. This time I put TOFU.  It's full of protein. In the morning, I went to a clinic. Although my cholesterol level is high, it seems to have finally calmed down and I don't need to take medicine.

Friday

Finally, the supermarket nearby is open for the first time in two weeks. It is renewal. I can walk, so it's very helpful. I bought "Opening commemorative sushi" there.. Well, isn't it good? It is said for 100-yen conveyor belt sushi will disappear. will sushi return to unattainable dish as stars?

Our performance at karaku cafe in September

This week my friend Ms. Ukai masako and I performed at Karaku cafe.

She introduced a essay.

 

I translated the story.

Advice column by Satou Aiko

Now she is 98 years old, and is still working as an author.

The famous book of Satou Aiko is "Is it happy to become 90 years old?"

Another famous book is "Useless advice columns". She published this book when she was 93 years old.

She says "as long as you set your mind to it, you can do anything."  This time I'll introduce an episode from this book.

I’m almost in my 30’s. I want to be a lady who is intelligent and well-educated.

I’m self-employed and not married yet.

I work as a writer on the web and magazines.

I have a lot of opportunity to meet older or higher ranking people.

When I meet them, I become embarrassed because of the lack of my education. I feel shallow.

So I can’t talk to them well.  I have attended workshops about communication sometimes, but they don’t seem to be effective to me. I don’t know what I should study. I want to have a wealth of topics, and to become intelligent. What should I do?

The author Satou Aiko answers.

What are you talking about?

You are a 29 year-old-lady, and you work as a writer on web and magazines.

Are you a comedian? Give me a break.

Why do you ask such thing to others? It is like you ask “where should I go” at the ticket counter of a station.

For the first time I want to know what kind of web or magazines you are involved and what contents you write.

You introduce you are a writer, so probably your work is to put together opinions of some people, or introduce information that people are interested in.

So whether you are willing or not, naturally you get more knowledge, and become well-educated, don't you?

Do you think being intelligent means having a big amount of knowledge and information? It’s not true.

There are many stupid people though they have attended lots of workshops.

Why are they stupid? They just put the knowledge or information on the surface and don’t digest them. Experience is necessary to digest them. Real intelligence is supported by experience. Attractive people are supported by such experience and knowledge.

For example when a friend reveals a severe concern to you, does he or she want the advice like “Friedrich Nietzsche says ---“? It doesn’t work.

That friend wants sincere comfort and for you to rack your brains and solve the problem together.

The person who can do it is an intelligent and well-educated person.

You don’t need to have a wealth of topics.

You listen sincerely and ask some questions. Give a big nod when you understand.

You just need to be good at listening.

While you are worried about what you should study to become intelligent, you cannot be

troubleshooter 0910

Unfortunately on troubleshooter of this week , my interested article wasn't chosen. So I tried to translate by myself.

Anyway I learned it seems to often happen to cut off between siblings.

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I haven’t talked with my sister who lives in the same house for more than one year.

Dear troubleshooter

I’m in my 30’s. My sister who lives together is three years older than me and has emotional ups and downs. When she gets upset, she tends to talk less. Sometimes she didn’t talk with me for a while. But this time, she hasn’t talked with me for more than one year. It is the first time to last the situation.

My sister was unable to go to school for a while when she was in junior high school. But she went to college, and got a national qualification. She works now. So my mother is proud that my sister overcame her experience of missing school. So my mother always prioritize how my sister feels than any members of my family.

A few years ago, when I introduced my boyfriend to my family, my sister got so upset. Since then there has been an unspoken rule not to talk about my boyfriend at home. Then I told my parents that my boyfriend passed a national qualification secretly. Since the next day my mother hasn’t talked with me.

I’m really tired of being concerned about my sister. I really understand the way my parents are concerned about how, so I can’t show my feeling. I’m really full of stress when I think about my parents nursing issue after I get married. What will happen to us? How do I deal with this family problem?

Advice

Dear Ms.E

Between sisters or brothers whose age is closer, they sometimes become rivals, and sometimes hate each other. I think for your sister you are considered as her rival to get good rating from your parents.

I advise you to be apart such a pointless conflict. 

You have a job, so living by yourself is one way to be apart. It is necessary to keep the distance mentally and practically.  You need not to be controlled by your sister’s emotion. 

You don’t have to think about your parents’ nursing issue. Because it is the long way off.

You should focus on what you can do now. It means you should become the person who is not controlled by current your sister.

What is important is not to be on age when your sister get upset. If you always stay composed seeing your sister, you are not afraid of anything about the future of you and your family.

Good morning 0914

 

Yuki went to a clinic and got tested. The result will come in one week. According to Yuki the doctor seems to be optimistic his health score saying because from the aging.  Yuki keeps in good health with physical strength but anyway he gets older.

Yesterday it was the day of  Karaku. Regular customers came to enjoy our performance. 

Today I will make some documents in the morning without going to the gym. Probably I will  do walking exercise in the evening instead of workout.

Good morning 0912

 

Monday has started.

Both of us are going to clinics. I go there to take regular medicine. Yuki goes to a clinic , it is the first time. Unfortunately His result of health check said that he needs to see a doctor and get some advice.

This weekend I organized a closet. And a big garbage bag was made. we’ve just taken out bags of garbage. 

Today , it is the day of taking out burnable garbage.

lunch diary 0911

Monday

We went to a new mall which has just opened. It is next to the station. We bought discounted hamburger steaks at the supermarket inside, and grilled them at home for lunch. 

Tuesday

We still get Moroheiya. The "Nira"  grasses in the garden are starting to bloom. Since they blooms at this time of year, I think they are  edible "Nira", but I don't feel like eating them because they are growing everywhere like usual weed.

Wednesday

Bitter gourd also arrives even in September. I cooked fried rice with Goya. Even in September, cucumbers, bitter melons, and other summer vegetables arrive from our friends.

Thursday

Disaster prevention day week? The expiration date of our stocked foods has not come yet, but  some of them are  until November. We have to eat our stocked preserved foods. Canned curry has already gone, so I bought a canned food set, though they are not curry this time. Come to think of it, recently we haven't seen "Inaba Curry".  I wonder if it's becoming difficult to produce it in Thailand?

Friday

I had some "errands"  at Karaku café, so I went there and had curry for my lunch. On that day, I went to a pear orchard and a friend's  house with figs and so so. At each place I  exchanged  some things,. At Karaku café, bitter gourd was replaced with cake.

Full moon 0910

 Last night it was full moon .  It is called “chusyu no meigetsu”. 

At some traditional Japanese sweet shops, special sweet dumpling is owls only on the day.

We went out to get them all th way. At the first shop, it was already sold out. We got them at the second shop.

 Coincidentally on the way home I found “Susuki” grass (pampas grass)

 in the field.so I didn’t need to buy them,

Japanese Pampas grass is offered as a way of inviting Gods and is also believed to have a role as a charm against evils. And, during the moon viewing, it is believed eating Otsukimi-Dango will provide health and happiness to us.

Good morning 0909

 

Two loaves of bread as come. Today it is thick sliced cheese toast. We know it is high calorie.

Our elder daughter T sent some flyers and post cards of her exhibitions. “So” I go to cafe Karaku with them. Unfortunate around us, few people go to Tokyo. And no one go to Kagoshima. 

But some customers of cafe Karaku are interested in arts, and some of them work at he city art museum. So even though they don’t go to see her exhibition, they might advertise her exhibition to someone connected with arts.

Good morning 0908

 

According to the fortune-telling on today’s news paper good luck comes if I organize somewhere.

Coincidently yesterday I organized a small mobile shelves and I put out all things from it. And I was thinking I use the shelf effectively. So I will organize other closet using the empty mobile shelf.

Good morning 0907

 

Yuki has already left. He went to play golf. Typhoon didn’t hit this area, though it will rain in the evening according to the weather report. 

Last night it was a humid night. So I couldn’t sleep well. Do I take a nap in the morning or go to the gym? Anyway I can choose what I want to do. It is a good thing of my retirement life. 

For these two months(during children’s summer vacation) I had irregular lesson at night.  Thinking back, I was really active.  But now I also think it is all right to have nothing todo at night.

On today’s newspaper, fig spring rolls were introduced. I know a farmer who has a big fig trees. It is time to visit him.

Good morning 0906

 

Yesterday, I did walking exercise. Finally walking season has come back.

The results of our health check arrived. Unfortunately they were not so good. 

However about me it was as I had expected. It means the bad points were not found more except high HDL. I will see the doctor  with this result, though I don’t want take medicine.

Unfortunate there were some bad points on Yuki’s result. He needs to see a doctor to get some advice, or re-extermination. He is going to go to a clinic next week. 

Good morning 0905

 

Monday has started. It is cool. 

In the morning we are going to go to a new mall which opened in front of the station last week. 

Probably it will be a good walking exercise. 

We are not decided whether we eat lunch out or not.

lunch diary 0903

Monday

We went to see cosmos in the field. They were in full bloom.  Then we went to café Karku to have lunch. I had pilaf with Japanese plum and Shiso herb and my husband had meat sauce spaghetti.

Tuesday

I cooked rice vermicelli with plenty of mulukhiya. It got cooler all of a sudden.  I put away the sleeveless clothes in the closet, and put  sleeves more in it. I organized the closet. Unfortunately I could discard nothing.

Wednesday

I stir-fried left over all summer vegetables like bell peppers, green onions, okra with tenjamen paste. Anyway one-pan dish.  It was neither cold nor hot, but it was very humid. On the day the news constantly reported  a typhoon hitting Okinawa. Well, what would happen?

Thursday

I was going to cook  "kinpira gobou  (fried carrot & burdock)", but I changed them into fried rice with kinpira gobor.  It was pretty good. In the afternoon, it suddenly became hot, and For me it was a tough day.

Friday

A new refrigerator  finally comes. The old one sometimes became difficult to get cold enough, and we were worried  about what would happen, but it kept working well until today. I fried  frozen dumplings and reduced frozen items as much as possible.

Delivery came at night. So we had dinner earlier than usual and  cleaned the old fridge with gratitude, and waited for a new fridge.

I am also mourning the demise of Queen Elizabeth II.

 When I was a girl, I used to read the book about queen Elizabeth. 

For me the real queen was only her. 

People in Japan cherish ties with the Queen

My deepest sympathies.

Good morning 0901

 

September has started.  It was a really tough summer. I have to say the same phrase every year? The climate is changing every year. Can I adjust to it as I age?

Today I am going to hold a zoom meeting to see my haiku youtube. Thankfully a person shows interest to it, though it is not sure she will be able to participate in the zoom meeting. 

The meeting opens at 7pm (Japanese time) and 40 minutes later it automatically closes. Are you interested in it?